–Mari SanGiovanni
Author of: “Greetings From Jamaica, Wish You Were Queer…”

I like the no label aspect of Otalia. It does leave it open for the viewer to decide. For the moment anyway. I would like to see them embrace the term lesbian down the road however. Once they both get to that point.

My religion is about love….

I am sorry to hear you live in a ‘place’ where your experience appears to be so negative. Hopefully it is because of tales like Otalia or in communities where the two soccer moms or the neighbor, who nicely gives a lift home, that opinions in this world can change.

I also would be careful going as so far to assume a person’s age. Something tells me the geography, community and circumstances have way more to do with the acceptance some who have posted here feel then simply the journey tread by ‘those who came before’. I, for one, know brave people in same-sex partnerships or brave people who are advocates for the LGBT community that range from their 60′s to their teens and each of them, in how they walk through their life, is finding ways to slowly break down those walls – no matter which decade they were born.

Respectfully I think this is glib and dismissive of those of us who still live in quite hostile environments where our sexual identity could be a very big problem for our families and neighbors. I am thrilled beyond words that it is different for many now -really!

I don’t have the particular need to announce myself to them, and by nature I’m a private person, but what I KNOW is that they assume I am straight, and what I KNOW is that it would be a HUGE negative deal for them if they knew I was not.

“I don’t expect (nor do I want) people I’ve just met to declare their sexual orientation to me! No thanks.”

I don’t really need to know that either, but I DO need to know if they will decide they need to beat me up, evict me from my home or fire me from my job if they know mine. Do delude yourself into thinking this no longer happens because it does.

“So, I give the neighbour’s kids a lift home if I see them at a bus stop; my partner makes a wedding cake for another neighbour’s daughter; we organise the cutting of the grass verges around our estate….we’re just members of the community. We’re respected, liked (I think!lol), invited, included and recognised as a couple. No megafone necessary!”

I am so very glad that you are benefiting from those who went before you and had the courage to claim their identity, yes occaisionally with a megaphone [harvey milk comes to mind] so that enough people now are “used to it” so you can have a pocket of normalcy to live in. But there are still people around in many places that would not let you anywhere near their children, who would not eat a cake you made, who would never think of you as part of their community no matter how great you are [and I am sure you are.]

I think the GL Otalia story is great as it, I love it and would not change a think about it. But it is one experience, one story. I think the characters are afraid about their relationship BOTH because of the personal implications and character arcs, but ALSO because they know that no matter WHAT they call themselves, they will be treated by some with homophobic reactions. They have already gotten a snootful of that from Frank “going down the wrong path” Cooper and they can expect it from Alan. Olivia fears it from Philip and even though I think that fear is unfounded it drives her actions.

Someday we may live in a label free utopia – we are not there yet. This story may help us along the way, but please don’t get carried away and think it applies directly to the experience of all same sex couples. There are still some of us out here getting the crap kicked out of us every day.

And you bake muffins too? *thud*