As promised, I continue to keep my eye on the progress of All My Children’s same-sex character couple, Marissa and Bianca.  I have written in the past about other “my girl-heart wants your girl-heart” pairings that were intimately handcuffed by the television network, so it’s only natural that I have my finely-honed senses at the ready for any signs of restraint.  I’m happy to report that, so far, the only bracelets slapped upon the wrists of this daytime couple are the ones that separate this steel magnolia from the animals.

In one costume change and less than 48 hours of soap time, there have been two girl on girl kisses (three if you count the Friday/Monday re-do), a relationship reveal to both friends and family, an offer of a place to co-habit, and an explanation to Marissa’s kid that AJ has two mommies.  All this before a first date?  This is fracking fast for even REAL-life lesbians!  I keep telling myself that something has to happen.  Could this be a same-sex, soap storyline for the history books (unfortunately, only to be read in California), or is the other designer shoe about to fall?

I keep thinking that Marissa’s scorned ex, JR, will provide some kind of drama that will put the brakes on this relationship, but he would have to sober up (not to mention loosen up, as he is the stiffest drunk I’ve ever seen) to provide any outside force to act upon AMC’s less than platonic, perpetual motion machine.  Hell, even “Binx”, when given the choice this time, showed some progressive backbone and chose her new affinity over her family.  Perhaps David has replaced Bianca, too, as the old character would have dropped everything to save her mother…again.

So, ABC, I have to ask, will the only handcuffs I see in this affair be the fuzzy pink ones on the nightstand?  And why not?  You have certainly unlocked the strangle hold most other networks’ standards and practices have on same-sex couples.  CBS’s Guiding Light gave their viewers a year long romp in the lovelorn “Hey,” followed by an insulting barrage of faux finger intimacy obviously forged by the front office.  “Minx”, on the other hand (pun absolutely intended) shows no signs that other body parts won’t be utilized in this romantic pairing.

So far, I’m still watching, but I have some questions.  This bloom-boosting romance of Bianca and Marissa, could it have been frantically fertilized by AMC’s cancellation?  And what about the move to the web? Once we begin to see the scenes shot after the web series announcement by Prospect Park, will this slow down the fruition, or will this decidedly deflowering of Marissa continue at the same rate?

I guess ABC holds the key to more than just the handcuffs.  We’ll see.

Soap Opera Network is reporting that ABC will carry the Daytime Emmys next year as the House of Mouse discovered the CW garnered a 2.4 rating (3 million viewers) last night, the networks highest ratings share in months.  I smell a rat.  I surmise Mighty Mouse is not out to save the day, but merely muscling in on the green cheese.

Adding to my confusion of last night’s programming, was a bizarre segment that I can only refer to as Project Skankway.  Introduced by CW’s Tyra Banks, soap stars such as Susan Lucci were drafted to slink and slime their way across the stage to the reverberating rewind of a fashion photog’s camera in order to showcase the fashion forward sense of daytime TV.  Really?  Are they watching the same soaps I am?  Seems quite a dichotomy between thought and action considering the celebrity green room was sponsored by K-mart.

Speaking of dichotomy, whose idea was it to run a beautifully emotional segment on Feed the Children on the high heels of that fashion abomination?  The subject matter, the heroic people involved, and the children deserved better.

Betty White introduced the Guiding Light tribute segment in a way only Betty White can, with humor and with grace.  Seventy-two years of broadcast and over 16,000 episodes is a benchmark never to be matched.  Fans of the show have voiced their displeasure at having the segment come to an abrupt end before deserving recognition was attributed.  To me the ending was synonymous to the cancelation.  There was a quick fade to black and a brusque musical silence as if the fat lady was choked off just as she was warming up to sing.

I went to bed wondering…which one of these soaps will be cut off next year.

Don’t get me wrong; I feel a little honest competition between entities and their fans is healthy. I grew up where college football is a second religion, and I spent a few years in the Ipswich Town stands, a real-life example of Lena Heady’s “Luce” yelling, “You’re a WANKER #9!” That was probably the nicest thing my mates and I yelled. Ask my partner and she will tell you my competitive streak emerges in regard to just about anything from playing board games to working out. Though I will admit, in all my willingness to oppose, an emulous comparison of daytime drama pairings never entered my mind. Perhaps this is because history has shown so little priority placed on same-sex partnering by the media as a whole. The fact that daytime, a historically conservative hierarchy, seems to be the only genre willing to move forward with substantial life-issue storylines involving LGBT experiences is something I consider progress worthy of guarded praise not competitive mud slinging.

I have researched and written a couple of pieces chronicling daytime’s commitment to homosexual themed storylines starting with Part 1, Before BAM (Bianca and Maggie) and Part 2, BAM, the Greatest Story Never Told. Part 3, After BAM to the Present, is in the works now. I hate to be trite, but we HAVE come a long way, baby. I am not saying that we shouldn’t voice our concerns or criticize the networks, the writers, the producers, or anyone else that portrays our stories with little regard other than a ratings point or two. We should not hesitate to question all media executives in regard to the pace, the courage, and/or the commitment to the forward movement of these portrayals. I believe as members of the community represented on screen it is our responsibility.

That being said, from a fan’s perspective, I agree that no two storylines are created equal; some of it you buy into, some of it you don’t. It’s all personal preference as with anything else in life. I have a close friend who prefers a good pair of athletic shoes as her choice of daily footwear; me, I believe athletic shoes are only for the gym and the playing field. She prefers cowboy boots as formal wear; me, a classic pair of calf-popping, peep-toed pumps with a great silhouette and a designer label is a must. Now, because we choose to support a different fashion pair, do I call her a pseudo-leather, shit-kicking, no label-loving, slob? Hell no! I love her; she is my friend. (Sorry, hon, it was just an example.) Then why do we do this to ourselves over inane soap opera storylines that may one day dwell only in the annals of history? I have asked this question a hundred times over the last few years and have pondered it exponentially more. I never get a good answer.

So, I say we just come out from behind the protective cover of message boards and trade magazines and suit it up on the field. Why not? If there is going to be a competition why not make it a real one? We could hold the Same-Sex Super Bowl at the sunny location of our choosing. All My Children would host a three-way play-off with BAMfans, Liancafans, and Breesefans. After all, AMC started this mess. Hey BAMfans, find that old Maggie jersey, strap on the pads, and start smacking someone. The winner will face off against OTALIA and their purple people eaters. Guiding Light may be canceled by then, but that’s all right, so have all the other storylines. It doesn’t matter; bitter loyalty seems to have no expiration date. Sound asinine? That’s because it is.

There is no one storyline or one fan group is any more avant-garde than the other. They have all been progressive and groundbreaking in and of themselves. Within these four story arcs, there is the first same-sex kiss in daytime television, the first same-sex love triangle, the first same-sex (relatively) long-term committed relationship, the first same-sex love scene that allowed more than hand-holding and a quick kiss, the first same-sex marriage, and the first same-sex storyline that openly addresses the consequences of religion and children in the relationship. Amazing. And they were all propelled forward by groups of people with an identity to each and a tenaciousness to see it through. Bravo. Why would anyone want to cheapen these accomplishments by veiled, snide references and sophomoric innuendo?

When it comes right down to it, it’s all about personal choice, comfort, and fit. One storyline could be my soft place to fall, but to another it may be just another rock and a hard spot. Just like my friend’s and my footwear preferences; we both may not make the same choices for a myriad of reasons, but we respect the choices each has made.

I know my curiosity regarding the competitive phenomenon doesn’t apply to everyone, but hey, if the shoe fits…